[ monday eve ]

Pastor Jeff gave a really great message yesterday at the Vineyard. I wish I could remember all of what he said, but here is some truth that dug deep:

As followers of Jesus, we really are subjecting ourselves to risky business in serving God, trusting in His sovereignty for our lives and giving up all control in hopes of being used with power. We shouldn't be surprised, then, if sometimes we feel as if we're riding a rollercoaster, our lives lined with a sort of 'emotional ragged edge.'

The more I seek to align myself with the gospel, the more I feel like a young woman whose life isn't put-together, who must cry out with to her Savior, "My Jesus," sometimes with little or no understanding as to why I feel the way I do. Hearing this message from Jeff and looking at the lives of those in the Bible who cried out regularly is refreshing and needed. Paul's tear-stained cheeks. Jesus weeping for Jerusalem. David's questioning and persistence (check out Psalm 10).

We serve a huge God, yes. Really, though, God cannot be kept at a safe distance if we are to imitate Jesus Christ. The power of the gospel does not translate into safety, but into an invitation to be "caught up personally in the drama of Jesus' death and resurrection" (Manning, The Importance of Being Foolish). The foolishness of the Cross brings the power and wisdom of God, and really, it brings us the freedom to be caught up in the kingdom-work God is accomplishing in the world. Kingdom-work like reconciliation, restoration, and redistribution. Rich stuff that has the capacity to create deeper relationships, expanded views of the world, hearts beating and aligning with His own, and yes -- tear-stained cheeks in being caught up with the rugged, tough, suffering-but-always rejoicing call of God in Christ Jesus.

Jessie