[ the ocean is growing ]

It's been too long.

Almost two weeks! Whoa.

Big things have been happening lately. God has been softening my heart toward His power in my life, and has very tangibly answered prayer.

Something that's been pretty exciting: the beginning of a relationship with my friend Joe, who is in Chicago for the summer with Campus Crusade for Christ. I've always respected and appreciated him, so it's been a real blessing (to say the least) to experience the Lord's timing in our friendship. I'm really looking forward to serving in ministry with Joe at Muskingum & am grateful for his bold trust and faith in God's plan for our campus. Check out his blog sometime.

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Late last night I was spending a few hours reading and in prayer and was struck by the reality of God's taking me in "as-is."

There's a lot of aspects of God's character that resonate pretty strongly in my mind but haven't quite become fully integrated with my relationship with Him; ways in which He desires to move and work in my life that I don't quite grasp as an 'issues of the heart.'

I sort of broke last night, though. It was hard but also pretty refreshing, because I need to realize this more often that I do -- that I am truly accepted and called by God completely as I am, right where I am.

There's power in God meeting me where I am because it frees me from spinning in circles trying to figure out how everything fits together. Instead, He reaches out to me and almost audibly says, "Jessie, just trust Me."

It's funny, really, because it seems like fairly often I talk or think about God in this or that way but haven't taken ahold of His promises as they relate to and impact my walk with Him -- in an intensely relational way.

God's dealing with me with such compassion and revealing His strength in my weakness, even if I don't like to admit that I don't have it all together.

And that is the okay thing, because each day His mercy is new and He has placed forth some pretty big reconcilation with this world through His Son -- reconciliation that really should have a substantial impact on my life.

He's pouring out grace and pursuing us as we are, which just makes me want to throw my life into His will.

It's hard, you know, but so worth it.

We serve such a big God.

-Jessie